Happy Anniversary, Desperately Seeking Stephie!

One year, WOW! I am in disbelief that one year ago I pushed publish on my first post and thus started this journey of self discovery. I never thought this blog would turn in to what it is. I expected something more lighthearted and fun. Instead, I fell apart and put myself back together within these pages. In writing daily, I discovered hidden thoughts and feelings, recounted memories that had been pushed aside or hidden, I learned to love myself and found the courage to make my dreams a reality. Every single post is real and me and what I was going through that day.

I have proven to myself that I am valuable of choosing me, of making me a priority. There were days I didn’t want to write but, even a few sentences counted. I wanted to give up and delete the whole thing more than once. I wanted to erase the pain. I couldn’t do it. This blog has required me to make time for myself, for my thoughts every single day for a year. I am empowered by this milestone, for my followers near and far and the countless others that pop on from time to time.

I’m not sure if I’m desperately seeking Stephie anymore. I’ve found her and through a lot of hard work, we are one and the same. I haven’t decided what path I plan to take now. I know I do want to revamp the pages, pay more attention to them than just the blog. I have some big things happening that I haven’t shared because… I’m still working towards making them come true. I am on the right path though and I know that I am fully equipped to make them happen.

As for my life, while I have changed, what I want and need to be happy has remained the same. My family, they are what motivate me, they are the breath in my lungs and the reasons my heart beats. I may only have half of my family but, I am still very grateful. I think that’s the point of life. We learn that it is not about the destination but the journey… we are meant to live life to the fullest because each moment is a gift. We must be grateful for what we have before we can be blessed with more. Everything happens for a reason if we just pay attention to the signs lighting our way. God is good all of the time. Even through our darkest hours, He is there. Lessons have to be learned and sometimes they are unpleasant but, He never leaves us to go through it alone. Through Him, we can do all things.

I am confident in the woman I am. While doubts flutter about my mind, I have been equipped with the tools to understand what is real and true and what is attempting to persuade me off course. I understand that life is a roller coaster and to have the highs, we have to ride through the lows. If we close our eyes and take a breath, we might be lucky enough to speed through those lows just like on a real roller coaster.

Everything is different, the world has changed. As we prepare to come out of isolation, I am ready to show the world that Stephie used this time wisely. I started this journey as a caterpillar, this year I’ve been in my cocoon and now, I am emerging as a butterfly, ready to fly and show the world what I’m made of. So, what do you say? Are you willing to continue with me? To find out what’s next in my life? I hope so. Thank you so much for the company… here’s to another year!

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