I know it seems like I’ve been staying in the same topics lately but that is what is on my mind. I joined a webinar for an internship that could really set me up nicely if I got one of the spots. But, I am already doubting myself so much with school that I don’t know if I want to take that on as well. I’m scared of not being able to be everything I want to be. Of falling short of the woman I know I can be. The thought of all this makes me super excited and then doubt sets in.
I’ve got this. I know I owe it to myself to try. I just feel so much pressure on me right now. I’m realizing a lot of things that I am going to need to be responsible for and everything is going to fall on me. I don’t mind it, I just know that I can let my Nana down. I have to be her rock as she has always been mine. Miah and I can’t even talk about the future in regards to her because he just can’t imagine Nana not being the Nana she is, strong and stubborn, independent. She’s been his best buddy since Day 1.
I have to get my shit together. I have to take these huge leaps of faith because my family deserves everything I can possibly provide for them. We are blessed and will prosper from a place of abundance. I’m being tested. My perseverance, I can’t resort back to safety. I may get hurt but it is for a purpose and I will be better for it. It’s always worked out that way.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Nana is the wind beneath my wings. U have to elevate us to the next level. We are meant to stay here, this is just a resting point.
Ay, school awaits. No more procrastinating. I have to do what must be done.