I’ve come to understand that I am cut from a different cloth. The way I think, the way I feel and definitely the way I love is not the norm and I have struggled with trying to understand how little others give of themselves. I’ve always looked and asked for more than most are capable of. While there are women that want to rap about their wet ass pussies, and telling guys to reach that dangly thing in the back of their throat (which, I don’t have a problem with but, come on, save that shit for the bedroom) and guys are talking about destroying womens’ guts (again, be my guest), we don’t need to hear that shit on the radio. There are so many mixed signals being put out into the world and yet we expect to find our prince charming or our queen. Well, how is that possible when everyone is playing in the mud?
With the introduction of social media, we have lost sight of reality. Everyone uses filters to make themselves look more presentable (me included) and with a click of a button you can be talking to someone. There is no courting, there is no romance, thanks to apps like Tinder you can swipe – I’ve never used it so I don’t know if you swipe left or right but, one of them can instantly connect you with someone that’s dtf. Like really? Then you hoes expect a man to put a ring on it? Like give them something to respect, give them a reason to believe to feel like they are your one and only and then work towards that ring. And dudes, you be fucking like it doesn’t matter who is underneath you. Wtf? Sex is cool in the heat of the moment, when you only have a limited amount of time or when you just need that quick release. But, other than that, you better be making love to your woman, connecting with her on a soul level. You are supposed to become one while being intimate. That is the time to acknowledge and appreciate every nook and cranny of your partner, to show them the love you have for them, to engage in a conversation between your bodies and experience ultimate pleasure. The wham, bam, thank you ma’am shit was okay when you were young and you couldn’t last. As a man, show your woman that her loving is all you need.
Nowadays it is so easy to replace your partner. Everyone is talking about they want someone they can grow old with but when times get hard, you rely on your phone to find you someone else, something new that is light and easy. Go find an old married couple, one that’s been together for 50 years and ask them if their life together has been light and easy. Go on! They are going to tell you NO! But, then ask them if it was worth it. If being with the same person day in and day out regardless of what the day brought made the difficult ones easier to struggle through and a sense of appreciation for the good ones. Everyone makes mistakes, that is part of growing and if you love someone, you should encourage them to grow. You need to grow as well. You both need to work together so that you grow as a unit and not apart from one another. There’s going to be times when one needs to do something on their own or for themselves and if you’ve done the work, you will feel comfortable and confident that the personal growth will not negatively effect what you’ve worked so hard for. But, shit is going to hit the fan. It’s with your times of struggle, the hardships that make you appreciate all the blessing you have. What’s the sun without rain? What’s light without darkness? Because of one, you appreciate the other. I am tired of hearing that love is not enough. Love is enough. Love is the only thing that matters.
I have explained how essential love is and how it’s the ruling force. People have waged wars over love and they’ve conquered their fears, even done the impossible. What we wouldn’t do for love right? Then why do we walk away? Because our feelings are hurt? Because our ego is too large? Because we are scared? You should be scared of the alternative. I have said since I was a little girl fantasizing over my prince coming to rescue me, that I would rather have love and live in a cardboard box on the side of the road than in a mansion without love. It rings true to this day. Love rules me. It is the reason for everything I do, I do it out of love, with the ones I love in mind. I am not meant for this era, I was better suited for when women were still modest, when fighting for love was praised and not frowned upon, when the majority of men were faithful. I have changed so much in recent months but, this is not something I will sway on.
So, could you love me anyway? Could you stand beside me, feet buried in the sand as the waves continuously hit us trying to knock us off our feet? Could you forgive my mistakes because my love is stronger than my human form? Could you respect me as I forgive your mistakes without question? Would you show up for me when I’m scared? Would you pick me up when I fall? Could I hold your hand through it all? Is there room on that porch swing you’ll have when you’re older for me to sit next to you? Is your love for me enough to make you stay? When I disappoint you, could you love me anyway?