Each day I am finding happiness in the simple things. Yet, my go to things, even the thought of them make me sad. I mean that’s probably how it’s been easier for me to keep the weight off, I’m not munching every second but, I miss those little things, my blue slush and starburst minis and sour worms, etc. I miss watching my favorite movies and smiling all the way through or being silly and quoting their lines.
Lucifer came out this weekend with Season 5. We have been waiting for this, I was waiting for it. When it was released, I couldn’t do it. Tonight I somehow made it through the first episode and I felt like I was doing something wrong. So, now, I’m not sure I can watch the rest of it. Ugh!
Thankfully this week will keep me busy and distracting and that will hopefully be the norm moving forward. I am optimistic that the little things I love will bring me joy again. I am grateful that I am learning to find others. Like I appreciate the silence and spending time alone to think and pray, I love choosing water over sodas, receiving my morning mantra via email every morning brings a smile to my face, checking my memories on Snapchat every day…oh and google photos, and a few other things. Different doesn’t necessarily mean better but, it doesn’t mean worse either.
I am a simple woman. My goal is to be happy not have a million dollars. My version of happy is evolving. I recently noticed that my taste in music has become more open. I pay attention to the lyrics in songs even more than I used to. Mainstream right now seems to be all the same and that stuff is good on occasion but, when you’re growing, when you’re feeling, you need music to uplift, inspire, encourage you to let it all flow freely, not just have some catchy hook. I’m starting to see movement in the lyrics. That’s why I’m flirting with the idea of dance or maybe even being a guard instructor. I want purpose.
Believe it or not, I am actually getting sleepy and for a woman who has been closing her eyes lately at 2 or 3 am, I think I will take this time to say goodnight and let myself rest. Tomorrow is a school day for the boy and I have stuff I have to get to as well. I am proud of the simplicity of life. I am happy that my simple pleasures are even more simple as they don’t cost money. Finding pleasure in the things that make my heart happy, I’m still working on how to fill some of those holes… or you chop your nails off so you don’t have to think about it. Goodnight and sweet dreams to you all. Tomorrow is a new day and I plan to make the best of it. Until then…