I’m a simple being. My life has often been chaotic and I know that. Deep down though, I’m simple, my wants and needs are as well. I think that when I live simply, my life is better and so am I. I used to think I wanted to live in the fast paced world but the woman I am now, I love smelling the roses.
When I was little we didn’t have much. We had more love than most and a roof over our heads and each others’ time and attention so, in my head, we were rich. Growing up, all I really wanted was a garage. I know it’s silly but, we only had a car port. So, I wanted a garage. I wasnt concerned with the kind of car was parked in it as long as I had one. I’ve had a couple in my life now and I can’t even explain to you how accomplished I felt. I had provided myself something I didn’t have as a child. I can’t wait until I have a garage that’s mine and I’m not renting!
Now, as a mom, I don’t care so much about the garage. I just want my kids to have their own rooms. Miah is almost grown and there’s not been too many years that he’s had a room to call his own. I think it’s important to have your own space. I think I had my own room for two years if that. I didn’t mind sharing with my brother but, it was nice to have a space all my own. He deserves that and I feel like I’m letting him down.
Right now, the world we live in, it’s almost impossible to afford a place as a couple and it’s even worse by yourself. Then you add in a pretty pitty princess and it’s like finding a needle in a haystack. I was accused if having my priorities wrong but, they weren’t. Providing my children a home is first and foremost. Especially when that’s what they’re asking for. For their family to be together under one roof… no extended family.
I am racking my brain every day trying to figure this puzzle out and I know something will click because I am going to make it happen. I don’t need a designer purse, we don’t even need a couch to begin with. We just want a plac to call our own. A place that’s ours and ours alone so we can finally exhale. We are blessed to have a roof over our heads but, we deserve something that is ours. Plans change, people flake, but, all we need are the basics and each other.
I am not concerned with keeping up with the Jones’. I am obsessed with the my little fam having the essentials. A place to call our own, one where I don’t have to hide our princess, where we can be ourselves, have company and live free… that’s our dream. I am not looking to break the bank, just feel safe in my surroundings. There’s a lot I can live without, I continue to prove that. I am only interested in what I need to live a happy life with my loves.
It’s easy to judge someone and their motives when you don’t stop to understand where they are coming from. The less I seek approval from others, the more satisfied I am with myself. I know what I want and what I need to get there and I’m not holding my breath for approval or assistance. I feel like Sam on A Cinderella Story when she tells Austin Ames that waiting for him his like waiting for rain in this drought, useless and disappointing. I’m going to make it happen. Just keep believing.