I woke up a couple of times in the middle of the night feeling kind of restless, a little out of the norm as of late. I had to remind myself, happy dreams, happy thoughts, happy life and then talk it out with God. I eventually fell back asleep. Then I woke up this morning with a bad headache and my tummy not feeling too well. So, I knew it was going to be a rest and rejuvenate kind of day.
I spent most of the day watching movies with my babies, cuddling and enjoying our time together. I scratched the boy’s back as Raiyhn licked his back..haha. I made sure not to be on my phone as much so I could just be in the moment. I did start getting a funny feeling and so I had to chat with God again, I asked him for a specific sign and don’t you know, it came. I got in my head about it and then realized, I have to be happy that I got it. Regardless of how it made me feel, I asked and I received.
I had an amazing day filled with love and some good movies. We are currently watching one of our family favorites – Middle School. Our pup Rafe is named after the main character…we sure do miss him! Anyway, Miah and I had a good chat, we are gearing up for back to school and all of the unknowns we are facing right now. We are praying for some things to align so we can make the moves necessary for us to live the life we want. Somehow some way, it will all work out.
I talked to a friend this morning and made plans to hang out later in the week. I am so over being stuck at home. I’m not going out and doing anything stupid, I just need some different interaction in a different setting than my house. Perhaps we will Netflix and Chill, more than likely there will be alcohol! As I said, I am done doing this alone, I am strong enough to incorporate my people back in the mix, well, the people that want to be in my life. I’m not forcing anyone to be part of it. I won’t beg anymore.
I have changed in many ways and I look forward to everyone experiencing the new me. I think with support I will be able to grow even more, expand my mind to things that I have forgotten or need to open up to. I don’t know. All I know is I don’t want to feel unsettled anymore. I don’t think it suits me. I’m a happy go lucky kind of woman and I’ll always believe in the best. Tonight I didn’t delve in deep but, it’s because my mind and attention is on the movie and cuddles. That’s the most important thing right now. It’s an important thing for my family and although we are half the size, our rituals have not changed.