I did something. There’s a first for everything and I did something I am so proud of. It’s not an end to a means like I would have wanted but, it’s the start. There were no excuses or a chance to back out. I made a decision, I’ve been working towards this for months and today, I made a move. I know this is the start of something good, I just need God to show me the way so I can make it count. I am so thankful that He aligned everything to allow this to happen.
Things are looking up. I am doing my thing and feeling pretty damn confident about it. I had a list of things to accomplish today and moved right through them just as I did yesterday and what I plan on doing tomorrow. Maybe if I keep doing my part, showing up and getting things done, perhaps that’s what God needs to see to help me with the rest of the items on my list. There are some pretty big things I would like to check off. I mean, I’m willing to put in the work but, I can’t see the way just yet.
Finally, finally, Fi Na Lly, my family is seeing the difference in me – physically and mentally. They are not on the same page but, they are open to what I’m doing. For now, that’s a freaking win in my book. I have started to get complacent with eating healthy and I can feel it. I have to get back on track, man, I’ll be a force to be reckoned with when physically, mentally and spiritually, I’m all aligned. I feel a power within, I feel like even when I’m in a state of doubt, my inside, I guess my soul, it’s standing in that superhero pose that Amelia Shepherd (Grey’s Anatomy) stands in prior to going into surgery.
I don’t know how I became my own cheering section, or my own hero to be exact. I’m not looking to be saved, I’ll do my own saving. I don’t need anyone to lift me up or validate me because I’m doing a damn good job if I say so myself. I falter and I am quick to pick myself back up. I say my I am affirmations on the daily. I wake up and go to sleep with a happy, healing, grateful heart.
God with us, God for us, nothing can come against, no one can stand between us.
What you believe, what you think, it already is. There are so many realms with so many possibilities, the life that we live, the one that is real, it’s the one we choose, the one we gave power to. I allowed myself to fall but, I am stronger now and I know what’s meant for me is already mine. My life may not look like it just yet, but I feel it. It’s all mine, always has been, always will be.