I wanted to push myself and just do what needed to be done but I can’t. Part of putting me first is listening to my body. Its aching and my left eye is super red. I am really thinking it’s all stress. I noticed that if the day is more stressful, then my pains are worse, when it’s not so stressful, the pain is almost gone. Again, I know this is all part of the process. I can’t let this get me down or I can accept it, embrace it and keep going. I gave myself this day to rest so I can run my errands in the morning.
You know, the slow uneventful moments are sometimes just as important as the busy ones. Not necessarily because they are meaningful but because they are much needed. They give us opportunity to rest, to just be. For me, that is the time I use to go down the rabbit hole thinking about a situation or something I need to work out. I can give my thought to figure out the puzzle.
I think my brain needs a rest. I can’t manage to do it. I am even thinking in my dreams, running through things, working out the puzzle, making a plan and trying to remain positive, to pray and manifest what I want. I am looking for the thumbs up that I’m going in the right direction and starting to think that it’s only my approval that I need. I’m the one that decides if I’m going in the right direction.
If you find yourself with some extra time, instead of binge watching a show or getting lost on social media, first take time to give yourself a rest. Make sure that you breathe and work out anything that may be bothering you instead of holding it in. No good ever comes of that. A moment of rest doesn’t make you lazy… especially if you’re productive. I’ve been able to piece together puzzles that have been nagging at me for years. I’ve been able to complete them and let them go. Who needs all of that baggage?
I know there’s no rest for the wicked… I’m not wicked. I’m just a woman desperately trying to make sense of her life. Trying to find a way to make what I want come to life. So, on days that I’m not feeling well, instead of beating myself up for not getting what I need to get done, I am going to use that time to work on anything that’s on my mind. Do for me so I can do for others.